Within my previous occupation as a health care assistant I was subject to workplace bulling which was allowed to continue for an extensive period of time due to ineffective management of the situation. Vartia (2001, p.68) suggests that one of the consequences for the targets of workplace bulling is a feeling of low self confidence. This is indeed true of myself; although this occurred prior to commencement of university, I perceive that I am diffident stemming from this experience. This diffidence has influenced my academic studies and my practice upon placement.
Feelings:
I feel that I find it challenging to settle down within new groups of people. Whilst on placement I feel it takes a significant amount of time to work within my fullest capacity within the team. Spouse (2008, p.21) state that entering a new placement area can be a daunting experience; suggesting this may be because you are joining a team of strangers who already know each other. However I feel that my previous experience has heightened my apprehension and indeed Bach and Grant (2009) suggest past experience contributes to our attitudes and values and affects what we notice about other peoples behaviour and how we interpret it. Therefore I may unintentionally be vigilant for behaviour that represents past experience.
I feel I become emotive when conflict arises both upon placement and within the university environment; therefore I have a tendency to avoid sources of conflict. Furthermore; although I am aware of the need to challenge poor practice