Practical Uses Of Paralanguage

Practical Uses of Paralanguage & Non-verbal Communication.

A year ago, I had an argument with my father for an hour. On a fine day after the air was cleared, my mother insightfully cross-analysed the argument for my better understanding of the situation. She told me the argument was aggravated NOT because of the context of the arguments but the way I put it forth. To which my reply was, “I was not arguing, that’s the way I talk.”
Paralanguage
Now, this incident brings me to the topic of paralanguage. Paralanguage is a secondary communication tool which helps a speaker understand the way his words are interpreted. The tone, stress, and rhythm of the communicator is directly proportional to the amount of information perceived and, the attention
The tone and pitch must have given out the impression that I was arrogant or I did not respect his advices. Could it be the one-eyebrow-raised sarcastic ‘totally’ I accidently nudged into the conversation that altered the conversation to an argument?
Yes, totally!
‘Totally,’ a word that can be used to show agreement to a statement was altered to its opposite meaning. Though it was merely a word, it had the impact of disagreement immediately. Instead, assume that I said ‘totally’ with a nod, it would have brought out a sense of agreement between us. The combination of the non-verbal nod and the tone and pitch of ‘totally’ would have helped me deliver a different meaning altogether.
This is only one incident, we face the brunt and benefits of unfiltered paralanguage daily. The ‘hmms’ and nods of agreement by the listeners whilst a presentation in class help the speaker understand if the message is received with the intensity he desired.
The pitch, volume, modulation, rhythm etc. speak louder than words itself, often. It helps us to nuance meanings, even in the smallest of the ways. The use of paralanguage in communication is much more than a supporting role next to the words
It showed restlessness easily. I remained tight lipped, it must have suggested that I was annoyed and was not ready to easily let go.
The three gestures were completely different from each other and I didn’t use any words to describe my emotions.
My father’s titled head and raised eyebrows questioned, “What are you thinking?” even without saying it out loud.
As if I could not worsen the situation any less, I replied with a raised pitch. Although it was unknowingly done to grab his attention. The pitch and the tone while conversing impacted the thought that is to be communicated and the way it was to be delivered and received.
Non-verbal communication is important in all walks of life. A sales person who slacks to help you with the shopping gives you the vibe of disinterest in serving you. A pitiful smile after an excuse delivers the need of the person to be excused. A pat on the shoulder by your father speaks volumes than encyclopaedias on appreciation. Every little gesture adds to the meaning of communication. Every frown, smile, smirk, wink, wave, pat, slap, poke, eye-rolling, everything we do is communicating one thing or the