Funny Monologue Essay Example
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You know, everyone nowadays has a cell phone.
It's like their lives orbit around that rectangular piece of steel...and it's not even a sphere!
I can’t disagree though…I’m one of those people that just can’t part with their phone.
Every few minutes I’ll be checking my phone. (Mimes checking phone) Oh look! I have…zero missed calls, zero new texts, the facebook frontier is quiet…
Then I remember I’ve had zero incoming calls, zero texts, and I have three friends on facebook: mom, dad, and my dog. I used to have four but then the cat died.
Anyways, I’ll still be sitting there, or standing there, no difference, with my phone, just messing around with it.
I have one of those sliding phones*click, clack, click, clack*
It’s lots of fun until suddenly; I get a call from my mom wondering why I called. Hello? Oh hi mom….no I didn’t mean to call you!!!
Later on in my uncle’s house, I’m going to bed…getting real sleepy…*ALERT ALERT. ALERT ALERT*
I jumped out of bed, wide awake, grab the bat I always keep by for protection or something...you know.
I’m going around corners like they do in the movies, looking all cool like James Bond in his dino jammies.
I get the the room where I still hear *ALERT ALERT. ALERT ALERT!* going off…and I realize it was my phone.
Nothing like a text alert full volume at 3 in the morning to get the blood flowing!
I checked my phone to find that someone actually texted me! It was…my mother.
I read her message. It said that my dog, Sally died. My first thought: "Damn! Now I only have two Facebook
You know, everyone nowadays has a cell phone.
It's like their lives orbit around that rectangular piece of steel...and it's not even a sphere!
I can’t disagree though…I’m one of those people that just can’t part with their phone.
Every few minutes I’ll be checking my phone. (Mimes checking phone) Oh look! I have…zero missed calls, zero new texts, the facebook frontier is quiet…
Then I remember I’ve had zero incoming calls, zero texts, and I have three friends on facebook: mom, dad, and my dog. I used to have four but then the cat died.
Anyways, I’ll still be sitting there, or standing there, no difference, with my phone, just messing around with it.
I have one of those sliding phones*click, clack, click, clack*
It’s lots of fun until suddenly; I get a call from my mom wondering why I called. Hello? Oh hi mom….no I didn’t mean to call you!!!
Later on in my uncle’s house, I’m going to bed…getting real sleepy…*ALERT ALERT. ALERT ALERT*
I jumped out of bed, wide awake, grab the bat I always keep by for protection or something...you know.
I’m going around corners like they do in the movies, looking all cool like James Bond in his dino jammies.
I get the the room where I still hear *ALERT ALERT. ALERT ALERT!* going off…and I realize it was my phone.
Nothing like a text alert full volume at 3 in the morning to get the blood flowing!
I checked my phone to find that someone actually texted me! It was…my mother.
I read her message. It said that my dog, Sally died. My first thought: "Damn! Now I only have two Facebook