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Although Sally’s essay was written in order to try to persuade the reader to one side of a topic, the lack of a thesis statement allowed for the essay to come across more as an informative paper than anything else. Thus allowing for Sally not achieving the goal that was set while writing the paper.
In conclusion, Sally’s essay could be improved upon if she revised her organizational skills, sentence structure, and includes a thesis statement in her writing. If she were to implement these aspects into her writing, the essay would become easier to read, thus allowing for the reader to be more easily persuaded by the author’s